Gage's Serenity Read online

  “We don’t even know if I’m pregnant yet though. What if I’m not? I don’t feel any different, really.”

  “How will we know? It usually takes a week or so for bears to scent a pregnancy.”

  “Well, if I’m not, I should go into heat again next month. That would be a good indicator, right?”

  “Why is everything about your heat so different?” I groaned. It was going to take a while to get used to things being so drastically different for my mate. I couldn’t imagine what he’d have to go through each month if we’d failed to conceive.

  “I’m not sure. Because fate wanted to keep us on our toes?”

  “So if you’re not, we try again next month. Will your heats always be so intense?”

  “I’m sorry, no. That was a one-time deal for us. Many fox shifters spend their first heats alone and are miserable for a week, sometimes more, because they haven’t yet found their mates. I was lucky because we’d just found each other.”

  “Okay, let’s finish up the tour of the house, alright?”

  “But…the books. We haven’t read all the books yet.”

  “True. There will be plenty of time for reading all the books later. Let me show you around, and then we can come back. And we have to do some more talking later, as well.”

  “Okay. What are we talking about? Can we do that and have the tour at the same time?”

  “Yes,” I replied as I took Linus’s hand and led him from the library. I showed him around each room in the house, and he seemed to take it all in but might have been a little overwhelmed.

  “It’s a really large house. Why did your parents build such a big place?”

  “I’m not really sure. It’s a known fact that female bears have a difficult time getting pregnant. But maybe they were hoping I’d find my mate, and we’d end up in a family home type thing? I’m honestly not sure. We don’t live anywhere near any of my father’s family. And my mother was an only child, so there’s no family left on her side.”

  “Hmm. Well, maybe I can help you add a cub to the house. I know my parents wanted more than just me. Mom lost several for some reason, and we never knew why. After several losses, I know she started taking suppressors to stop her heats. Please don’t ask me to do that. If you don’t want to deal with it—”

  “Linus, I’m willing to have as many as you want. I don’t care if they’re cubs or kits. I actually like the idea of a little kit or two running around. But what’s most important to me is you. You’re my mate and, whereas I’ll cherish our children, I wouldn’t even have the possibility of them if not for you.”

  “Okay, so why is it that you say you don’t deserve me? Really, Gage, you’re amazing.”

  I looked off out towards the lake before replying. “I mess up a lot. I got an anonymous call telling me I needed to go over to Timber Valley and arrest the fire chief because he shot Orin. Never once did I think about asking Alpha War if I should actually do it. I just went and did it. Not my greatest moment. Then more recently, I went to the south beach with my siren on. War specifically told me not to run them. I remember him telling me not to, but for whatever reason, my brain just didn’t compute that the siren was running, and I needed to turn it off. Most of the time, I’m okay. But it seems that when I get overwhelmed, I just…I’m not sure. My mind seems to shut down.”

  “I think lots of us are like that. But just because you make mistakes, that doesn’t mean you don’t deserve a mate. I’m younger than you, but I’ve made tons of mistakes already.”

  I smiled at Linus. He was so young, probably too young, but for whatever reason, fate had decided we were ready to find each other.

  “Sweetheart, we need to talk about your parents.” I felt the sadness that instantly came over Linus, and I wanted to do whatever I could to take it all away.

  “I know we do. I have to figure things out. I need to get my stuff. I can live here with you now, right?”

  “Why couldn’t you? You did hear me earlier when I said the house was ours, right? As in yours and mine? You’re my mate, Linus. That means you’re mine to take care of and I’m yours. It works both ways. We’re partners.”

  I found my arms full of my little blonde mate, and I easily picked him up and carried him over to the couch.

  “What’s wrong, Linus? I know it’s difficult to talk about it, but we have to deal with your parents’ burial and their stuff.”

  “I understand that. We don’t have a whole lot. We weren’t able to bring much with us. Just a small bag each. Everything else was purchased here.”

  “Then it shouldn’t be too difficult of a task. But we have to take care of it. I’ll help as much or as little as you want. I know it’s not an enjoyable thing to have to do. I’ve been there. Just let me know if you need any help.”

  “Yes, please. I don’t even know where to start. Or what to do.”

  “We’ll get it taken care of. We’ll need to start with War. He’s asked what you want to do about their burial. Did you want them buried on den lands? Or did you want us to take them back to Alaska?”

  “There’s nothing for us in Alaska. On den lands is fine, as long as he’s sure.”

  “He wouldn’t have asked if he wasn’t. Now, what about the house and your stuff?”

  “We can donate the furniture if anyone wants it or find someone who needs it. I know there are some rooms in the alpha house that could use more furniture. Some of the smaller cabins out back as well. There’s very little that my parents had that I want to keep. It’s just things we’ve had for around a year. It’s not overly sentimental stuff. I’d like my clothes though. I didn’t have tons, but I can’t keep wearing the same pair of sweats.”

  “We’ll head over to the alpha house and see about talking to War and making arrangements for your parents. Then we’ll stop by their house and pick up your clothes. We don’t have to decide everything today. Your rent was paid for another month, so that gives you plenty of time to decide what you want to do with the stuff.”

  “What? Who did that? I was trying to figure out how I was going to come up with enough rent for another month.”

  “I’m sure it was War. He has den funds for such things. But when we get there, I’ll reimburse him. You’re my mate and I’ll take care of you and your things.”

  “You don’t have to do that. I’ll figure something out.”

  “I know. But I want to. That’s what mates do. Now, let’s go finish getting dressed, and we’ll head on out. I’m sure that Edison is anxious to see you and how you’re doing. He seems to have taken to you.”

  “Yeah, I really like him and Wallace. They’ve been so kind to me this past year.”

  “Then let’s go see them, shall we?”

  Linus got up off my lap, and we went back upstairs to find socks and shoes for both of us. It was too damn cold and snowy to be outside without either. My mate didn’t have a winter coat, so I gave him one of mine, but that wouldn’t do for long. It was several sizes too big. He looked cute in it though.

  Linus — 8

  “Linus, Gage, congratulations you two!” Arik said when he greeted us at the door as we walked in. Gage had brought me to our alpha’s house so we could discuss everything that needed to be done about my parents.

  “Thanks, Arik. Is War in his office?”

  “He is. Do you need Linus with you, or can he sit with me in the kitchen? The twins are down for a nap, thankfully, so I thought I’d try to be up and about more. I’m starting to feel a little better. Not much, but the tea dad gives me helps.”

  “If Linus wants to sit and talk with you, I don’t have any problem with that.”

  “You sure you don’t mind? I’d really like to catch up with Arik. I know we’re here to take care of everything with my parents, but can I maybe chat for a bit first?”

  “Of course you can. I’ll be in War’s office if you need me.” Gage gave me a deep kiss before he turned and headed to the office. I was sure he didn’t want me there for whatever they
had to discuss. I had a wonderful man for a mate, and already, he’d shown me in so many ways just what I meant to him. But I felt like I was bringing nothing but problems to our mating.

  “I’ve seen that look before.”

  “What?” I asked as I looked from the hallway where Gage had disappeared to back to Arik.

  “Whatever you’re thinking, you’re most likely wrong.”

  “Why would you say that?”

  “Because you have a look of guilt on your face. Grayson had that look not long ago. Actually, it was the same day he scented Jai. Do you want to talk about it?”

  “What’s there to say? I have nothing to contribute to our relationship. I know he’s settled and stable. I get that. But is it enough? Now he’s got me to take care of. And he mentioned how he resigned.”

  “You’ve been claimed. You know your mate, and who his parents were. Therefore, you know he’s financially stable. Even if he wasn’t War’s deputy, he’d still wouldn’t have to work.”

  “I understand that. But I just feel bad. I never intended to find a mate so young.”

  “Neither did Grayson. But the fates figured you two were ready. Therefore, Grayson found Jai and you found Gage. You also need to remember something. Gage is your alpha. You’re his omega. Yes, times are different now, but it used to be that the alpha took care of the omega.”

  “Ugh. I know. I really do. I just don’t necessarily like it.

  “Gage’s parents were well off. They were older and settled when they had him.”

  “Again, I realize all that. It still doesn’t help that I simply feel bad. He’s in there now talking to War about my parents and what needs to be done.”

  “Maybe. Most likely, War is telling him he can’t resign. I’m sure they’ll get to everything having to do with your parents and the house and all that.” Arik stood up and went over to turn on the electric kettle. “Do you want tea? Or something else to drink?”

  “No. I’m fine. But thanks though.”

  “It’s not great tasting, but the tea that Papa gives me really does help settle my stomach. So if you ever need any, just let me know.”

  “I will. Honestly, I don’t feel sick at all, so I’m not sure what’s going on.”

  “Well, your heat ended. I can’t imagine you not being pregnant. Although, I don’t detect a second heartbeat. Maybe it’s too soon.”

  “Maybe? I’m not really sure. I want to give Gage cubs. I know he’s tired of being alone.”

  “But he’s not anymore. He has you. And really, if he wanted, he had the den. I know Gage hasn’t always felt comfortable around us.”

  “No, he hasn’t. And I appreciate what you’re trying to say, Arik. I just need…I should get in there and let him know I want to help.”

  “If that’s what you want. Do you want me to call Papa? He can let you know for sure if you’re pregnant or not.”

  “I…maybe that would be best. I don’t feel any different. I know it would make Gage so happy. He wants cubs.”

  “Linus, don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Everything happens for a reason, and there’s a plan for everything. Let me get my phone and give Papa a call.”

  “Thanks, Arik. I’m going to go find Gage. He should be here.”

  “Good idea.”

  I got up and followed the hallway I knew led to War’s office. In the year I’d been a member of the den, I’d been in just about every room in the house. I knew exactly where I was going, even without following my mate’s scent. I found him in the office, exactly where I expected him, chatting with War and Troy.

  “There he is. Congratulations, Linus. I’m really happy that you and Gage scented each other. The timing was a little unusual, but I have to believe there was a reason for it,” Troy said as I entered the office. I smiled at him but went directly to my mate and wrapped my arms around his waist.

  “Thanks, Troy. I appreciate it. I’d be so lost without Gage. He’s an absolute perfect mate, and I couldn’t ask for a better one.”

  “That’s good to hear. I do owe you an apology though, Linus. You as well, Gage. I’m really sorry about how things came about in the beginning. I really never meant that I didn’t approve of your mating. I just didn’t think the timing was the greatest. And you’re very young, Linus,” War said.

  “Thank you, Alpha. I appreciate it. And I realize my mate is young. But I promise that it was his decision to mate, and he agreed or disagreed to any suggestions. I wouldn’t—”

  “I know you wouldn’t, Gage. I never thought for one moment that you would do anything that would hurt your mate. Ever,” War said as he looked imploringly at Gage.

  “Thank you, Alpha. I appreciate that. I know I mess up a lot, but I swear, I would never do anything to hurt Linus.”

  “We know that, Gage,” Troy said.

  “Gage, please calm down. They didn’t mean anything.”

  “I know.”

  “Linus, Gage was telling us that you’d like to have your parents buried here on den lands. I think that’s a great idea. I realize your family hadn’t been members long, but everyone here had come to care for you three a great deal over the past year,” War said, effectively changing the subject.

  “Thank you, Alpha. I really appreciate that. It had been just the three of us for so long. My parents started moving around when they started hearing rumors about Hank and his actions. We were really lucky when Ivan found us. I don’t think we would have made it this far without him. I know you have some history, Troy, but Ivan isn’t a bad man. You’re from up there. You know what the dens are like.”

  “I do. And I have no issues with Ivan at all. I knew the risks when I spent time with Sam. I honestly think it’s Ivan who is more uncomfortable around me. I don’t quite understand why, but that’s how I feel.”

  “Hmm…”

  “What?” Troy asked and Gage chuckled.

  “Behave, mate. There’s enough going on now. You don’t need to interfere.”

  “Yes, alpha.”

  “Nothing, Troy. I was just thinking out loud. Sorry. Anyway, Alpha War, I do appreciate the offer. Gage has been amazing and has told me we needed to get everything squared away. I won’t lie and say I know what all I need to do, but I’ll certainly try.”

  “Linus, we can do this as fast or slow as you need,” War told me.

  “I want to get it taken care of. I’m still devastated about my parents and what happened to them, and I don’t think I could get through this if not for Gage. But I need to know they’re taken care of. I want—”

  “Sorry to interrupt. Papa is here and I know you wanted to talk to him, Linus.”

  “Would you like me to come with you?” Gage asked as he looked down at me. He ran his fingers through my short hair, and I could tell just how much he cared for me from the look in his eyes alone.

  “Could you? Please?”

  “Of course,” Gage said before smiling at me. “Alpha, I’ll be back in just a bit, if that’s alright?”

  “There’s no need. I think we’ve discussed everything. We’ll get the arrangements finalized and get the items at the house taken care of after Linus goes through everything. Go be with your mate, and please consider what I said.”

  “I will. Thank you, Alpha.” Gage smiled at me again, and then gently took my hand and led me from the room.

  “What did you two talk about?”

  “He doesn’t want me to resign. I understand why, and I was upset when I did it. I told him it was something I’d have to talk to you about first.”

  “Gage, you don’t have to clear your job with me. You’re a grown man.”

  “I know that. But I’d like to spend time with you. And who knows how things are going to turn out. What if we have a baby in a couple months? We’re going to be busy.”

  “Yes, but I know you love your job.”

  “How?”

  “I’ve heard your thoughts. I know how you feel about it and all that’s happened.”

  Gage let
out a loud sigh as we entered the kitchen. I was excited to see Edison. It’d been a few days since I’d seen them last. I needed to thank them for everything they’d done for me.

  “Linus, Gage. It’s good to see you again. I see you took my advice, Gage. Congratulations on your claiming.”

  Gage snorted behind me before replying.

  “Thanks, Edison. I wanted Linus as much as he did me. I’m just glad things worked out and we’re together.”

  “It’s as the fates knew it should be,” Edison replied as he smiled at us.”

  “I’m sorry, alpha. I didn’t mean to be so impatient. I didn’t give you a choice in the matter.”

  “I know you didn’t mean to be impatient. And we’ve been over this. I was going to claim you, anyway. You just beat me to it, that’s all. I wouldn’t change anything about it.”

  “Love you.”

  “I love you, too, sweetheart. Now, let’s see what Edison wanted. Then we’ll go to your parents’ house and you can get more of your things. Actually, we have time. You can get all of your stuff and bring it with us when we go home. When we get there, I’m spending the afternoon with you curled up in front of a fire.”

  “That sounds wonderful. Thank you for calling it our house.”

  “Good. It was supposed to. And it is our house. You’re my mate, Linus. Everything I have is just as much yours as it is mine. Besides, I like pampering you. You just don’t let me do it nearly enough.”

  “Gage, we’ve been holed up in your house for almost a week. You’ve been pampering me.”

  “Not the way I want to.”

  I tried my hardest to give my mate a glare, but it just didn’t work. I wasn’t really upset with him and he knew it.

  “I’m so very pleased you two are as happy as you are. Arik said you wanted to talk to me, Linus?” Edison said as he looked at the two of us. Wallace wrapped his arms around Edison’s shoulders and pulled his mate into his chest. If only Gage and I were that devoted to each other after so long together.