Gage's Serenity Read online

  “Yes. I was wondering if I could ask you something.”

  Gage — 9

  Linus wasn’t pregnant. When Edison told us that Linus wasn’t pregnant, he took the news hard. I held him and did my best to reassure him, but nothing seemed to work. We’d buried Linus’s parents in the days following our discovery about failure to catch, and I felt that added to his sorrowfulness. He moped around the house, and I’d often catch him staring into the bedroom that was beside ours.

  “Sweetheart, come here,” I said as I caught him staring into the empty bedroom once again.

  “Why, Gage? Did I do something wrong? Why didn’t we get pregnant when you claimed me? Everyone else in the den got pregnant. Am I too young?” I pulled Linus with me into our bedroom and settled on the couch that was against one of the walls. Linus willingly sat on my lap, and I wrapped my arms around him before giving him a soft kiss.

  “I can’t answer any of your questions, mate. I’m sorry. But know this. If we’re meant to have cubs and kits, we will. The fates will give them to us if we’re supposed to have them. If we never have any, that won’t change how I feel about you.” I ran my fingers through his hair and looked into my mate’s tear-filled eyes. It hurt me and my bear that we couldn’t fix what he was going through. Through our bond I could feel the sorrow he was feeling and it broke me.

  “Yeah, but we’re fated, you don’t have a choice.”

  “Yes, we are. But fated matches don’t always mean love matches. Look at Ivan and Sam. They’re fated. They’ve had five children together and another on the way now. But you can’t say that they’re very much in love with each other. Sometimes it doesn’t happen that way.”

  “See! Even Sam gets another cub. Why can’t I have one?”

  “Linus, it’s okay. It’ll happen when it’s supposed to. Until then, we can get to know each other better. You can try again to teach me to bake cookies like you want, and I’ll keep teaching you how to drive. There’s so much we can do. We don’t have to have children to be complete. I was complete the moment I scented you.”

  “I love you, Gage. I’m sorry I didn’t give you a cub.”

  “I love you, too, Linus. But I’m not sorry. It’s okay. It’ll happen when the fates know we’re ready.”

  I held Linus as he cried. He was so devastated, and I simply didn’t know what to do to make it better. My bear was pissed at me because I wasn’t fixing what was wrong with our mate.

  “Sweetheart, remember, you told me that you’d go into heat each month until we had a cub or kit, so really, we might be pregnant next month.” That seemed to get Linus’s attention, and he picked his head up off of my shoulder and looked at me. I wiped his tear-soaked cheeks and gave him a deep and meaningful kiss. I’d had so very few opportunities to explore my mate, and I was at a loss as to what I could do to distract him.

  Cradling Linus’s much smaller body in my arms, I stood up and strode over to the large bed we shared and gently set my mate down on it. When we were both finally naked, I started at one foot and kissed, licked, nibbled, and sucked my way up one side of his body, and after spending several minutes dueling with his tongue, I abandoned his mouth and zeroed in on his claiming bite.

  “Mmm, Gage, stop teasing.”

  “Always so impatient. Let me enjoy myself, mate.” I gently bit on his claiming bite, careful to not break the skin, and I felt Linus’s cock jerk between our bodies, and I got another, louder moan from him. I continued my travels southward to my intended target, his hard shaft. When I reached it, I swallowed it down to the root completely and sucked.

  “Gage!” Linus shouted before he started panting and gently thrusting his hips upward. I pulled off his cock before he could fill my mouth though, and then I licked up the slick leaking from his hole. Linus leaned down and grabbed two handfuls of hair and yanked, hard.

  “Ouch!”

  “Sorry. Gage, I need you!”

  “And you’ll get me, mate. Patience. You need to have some,” I responded and chuckled as I got up on my knees. I crawled up to the head of the bed and leaned back on the headboard and stroked my cock. “Come here, mate,” I said as I continued to run my hand up and down my shaft. Linus dove for me, causing me to laugh at his enthusiasm.

  “What do you want me to do?”

  “Whatever you want. My body is yours to explore and you can…mmm.” I moaned as Linus licked up my cock and twirled his tongue around the thick head before he swallowed down as much of it as he could.

  “Can I ride you?”

  “Yes, sweetheart. We can do whatever you want.”

  I immediately found myself with a lap full of my mate. He turned around and reached behind himself and pointed my cock while lowering his opening. We both groaned when the head popped through, and then he sunk all the way down.

  “Gage. So good.”

  “Linus, sweetheart. I need you to slow down. I’m not ready for this to end just yet,” I pleaded as I grabbed my mate’s hips and slowed his rapid movement.

  “But, Gage. It feels so good.”

  I held Linus’s hips and pulled him down tightly as I felt my knot start to inflate. I’d be able to hold it off for just a little while, but not long. There wasn’t much Linus couldn’t get from me. My knot included.

  “See, so good, Gage,” Linus moaned out as his channel clamped down on me, and that was all it took. I grabbed his hips and held his slight body away from mine as I thrust up into his slick hole over and over until my knot popped out, and I couldn’t pull out anymore. When that happened, I pulled Linus back against my chest and rubbed up and down his slim torso before wrapping a hand around his cock and stroking it. He shouted at the same time I felt and smelled his release.

  “Linus, love you…” I moaned as I felt my cock start to release my seed into my mate. We’d be locked together for the better part of an hour, but that didn’t matter to either of us. We didn’t have anything pressing we had to deal with. Linus panted and sunk back into my chest.

  “Why haven’t we done this before?”

  “What do you mean? We’ve done this before.”

  “Yeah, but it’s never been like this.”

  “Sweetheart, you were in heat before. We haven’t been intimate like this since your heat ended.”

  “Why?”

  “Well, we’ve been busy. There’s been a lot to deal with. I didn’t want to overwhelm you any more than you already were.”

  “Hmm, can we do this again?”

  “As much as you want,” I replied, and then chuckled as Linus sighed and drifted off into a light sleep. I scooted down a little more, and then just sat there with my arms wrapped around Linus, listening to his steady breathing.

  Did I want cubs and kits with him? Sure. But it wasn’t the end of the world. I meant it when I told him he was all I’d ever need to feel complete. But I couldn’t handle feeling the heartbreak he was going through because he didn’t get pregnant when I claimed him. What did we do differently than the others in the den? The fates were kind enough to gift us with each other. Now, would they bless us with cubs or kits? I didn’t care which, but if Linus desperately wanted one, I hoped the fates felt we deserved to be so blessed.

  When my knot deflated enough that my still-spurting cock could slip out, I did and gently laid Linus on the bed before I covered him with a blanket. I pinched the tip so I wouldn’t leak on the way to the bathroom. Luckily, my body realized it was no longer in my mate, and I stopped spurting my seed everywhere, and after a quick clean up in the sink, I took a clean rag to the bedroom to clean up my mate. I slipped in behind him and fell asleep with him wrapped in my arms.

  When Linus went into heat again not quite three weeks later, we went into it optimistic. We were both hopeful that this time around he’d catch and get pregnant. When his heat ended after just three days, we were both excited. It ending so soon meant he’d gotten pregnant, right?

  “I don’t feel any different, Gage. Why don’t I feel different? Wouldn’t I be abl
e to tell if I was pregnant?” Linus asked a couple days later. Sadly, neither he nor I could detect a heartbeat from what would be our child. His scent hadn’t changed, and he wasn’t experiencing any symptoms at all.

  “Sweetheart, we can always go have Arik do a pregnancy test. Or we could ask Edison again.”

  “I’m not pregnant. You can say it. I don’t hear a heartbeat and neither do you. We’d both be able to hear one if I was. You can say it.”

  “We can ask if you want to be sure, but I don’t think you are, sweetheart.”

  “But why? What are we doing wrong? Am I broken? Are you? I mean, I know everything is working down there for you, so it’s gotta be me, right?”

  “I’m glad my equipment is working to your satisfaction. We’ve been over this, Linus. Sometimes mates just don’t have cubs. Look at bears. It’s incredibly difficult for female bears to get pregnant.”

  “I’m not a bear, remember?”

  “Yes, I remember. You’re my cute little fox. Hey, why don’t we shift and go for a run in the woods?”

  “Can we go to…no. Can we call Edison and ask if he can come by? It doesn’t take him long.”

  “Linus, we don’t need Edison to let us know what we already know.”

  “I know,” my mate said in defeat.

  “Linus, what’s going on? Why are you so anxious about this?”

  “I want to give you a cub. I want to be a good mate.”

  “You don’t have to give me children to be a good mate. Just love me like you have been. That’s all I need. Besides, if you really want to ask Edison, we’ll see him tomorrow at dinner.”

  “Oh yeah! Wait! I can’t go for a run with you. I have to bake the pies. I told Arik I would. We can’t go to the den’s celebration dinner without pies.”

  I laughed at his serious tone. He did have a point, but he’d just realized we were having the big den celebration dinner tomorrow?

  “Do you want any help?” I asked.

  “Nope, I’m good. You can sit and keep me company if you’d like. Or if you have some work to do in your office, I would understand.”

  “You sure? I do have some paperwork that I keep meaning to finish and send off. I just keep getting distracted.”

  “Well, go do your paperwork and I’ll make pies. Then we’ll go for that run while they cool. Sound like a plan?”

  “Sounds perfect,” I replied before leaning down and kissing Linus. I turned and headed to my computer in my office. I’d let War talk me out of resigning and things had been noticeably different since I’d gone back to work. We had a third now at the station, a young wolf that had come over from Forest’s pack. He’d shown a great deal of interest in being a sheriff’s deputy, so much so that he’d gotten a criminal justice degree, and then came back to Honey Creek and asked War for a job. Emerson was a great help around the office and often volunteered to work and cover shifts. I often wondered if there wasn’t another reason why he was so eager to be in Honey Creek instead of Timber Valley.

  Linus — 10

  It was the beginning of December, and I needed to distract myself. I wasn’t pregnant again, and I couldn’t figure out why. Gage was an incredibly attentive mate. He’d knotted me at least a dozen times when I went into heat again but still nothing. What were we doing wrong? I’d have another heat cycle in a few more weeks, close to the end of the year, and I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to handle the disappointment of not catching again.

  I checked in with Gage—who once again was distracted and not doing his paperwork—and reminded him of his planned tasks.

  “Alpha, you were supposed to be doing paperwork. Why are you cleaning your office? I cleaned it the other day. Was it not satisfactory?”

  “The office is fine. I was looking for something but couldn’t remember what. Well, now I have to put back the mess I made.”

  “Do you need help?” I asked through our bond.

  “Are the pies baking?”

  “Not yet, no.”

  “Then I’m good. I just wish I could remember what it was I was looking for.”

  “Well, what were you doing?”

  “I came into the office. That’s as far as I got.”

  “You were going to do paperwork you said. Did you need to print it or something?”

  “No. It’s all on the computer. Oh yeah! That’s it. The mouse is missing.”

  “We broke it last week, remember? When you bent me over your desk and had me screaming your name in seconds. There were several things that got pushed off of the desk, and they broke on the tiles on the floor.”

  “Oh yeah! Did we order a new one?”

  “Was I supposed to? If I was, I didn’t know. Sorry, Gage.”

  “No, you weren’t supposed to. I think I said I would but then forgot.”

  “So how are you going to use the computer without a mouse?”

  “I’ll use the laptop. It has a touch pad.”

  “Okay. Let me know if you want my help with anything.”

  “Same. Although, when I try to cook with you, we usually end up not eating.”

  “Yes, but the pies are for tomorrow.”

  “Do I get one, too?”

  I rolled my eyes at my mate and projected it to him. He responded by chuckling. Him and food. Not that I was complaining. I had a wonderful life here with my mate.

  “Linus? Sweetheart?”

  “Yeah?”

  “You’re sad. Why?”

  “It’s nothing. I’m just thinking is all.”

  I heard Gage before I smelled him behind me, and then I found myself wrapped up in his strong arms.

  “Sweetheart, it’ll be okay. No matter what, it’s going to be okay.”

  “I know. I just…”

  “Shh. It’s okay. What happens, happens. Now, about that pie.”

  “You’re impossible. You know that?”

  “Maybe. But you love me.”

  “Yes, I do. And yes, you’ll get your own pie. That’s why there are five on the counter.”

  “Are four going to be enough?”

  “Well, I’m not the only one bringing pie or other desserts. I think Wallace is baking, as well.”

  “Okay. I’m going back to the office. No more dwelling on things we can’t control, understand?”

  “Yes, alpha.”

  “Hmm. Come here,” Gage said before he picked me up off of the floor. I automatically wrapped my arms and legs around his body, and he kissed me until I was panting and ready to beg for more. Then, just as quickly as he picked me up, he put me back on my feet. “Pies first. Then we’ll continue that if you want.”

  “Yes, please,” I whined as I pushed at my hard cock. There would be no getting comfortable in my skinny jeans though. When I glared up at my mate, I could tell he knew exactly what he’d done. He looked smug but, after looking at him, he was in a similar predicament. “Need some help with that, alpha?”

  “Nope. My mate will take care of it after he bakes the pies he said he needed to make for tomorrow,” Gage said before turning and leaving. He was whistling a familiar tune as he walked off towards the office. Since when did he listen to pop music?

  I focused on my task at hand. Pies. I had to make the pies for tomorrow. Once they were baked and cooling, I was sure I could get Gage to…oh! Arik had told me…

  I heard a loud crash coming from the office after I projected the image of myself restrained to our bed with Gage’s handcuffs.

  “Everything okay in there, mate?” I hollered towards the office.

  “Linus.”

  “Yes, alpha?”

  “Behave.”

  I giggled and went back to mixing up the ingredients for the pies. Once they were in the oven, I continued to send my mate thoughts and images of us in various positions. By the time the kitchen was clean, the buzzer was going off, and I silenced it before I pulled out the pies and checked them. They were perfect so I placed them on the counter to cool.

  I squeaked when I turned and there wa
s Gage. Standing there holding his handcuffs out on one finger. I quickly found myself thrown over his shoulder, and then we were rapidly climbing the stairs towards our bedroom. We never did make it out for our run in the forest. But we did fulfill some of those fantasies I’d thought about. It was an amazing evening.

  The winter celebration dinner at the den was amazing, wonderful, and crazy. War and Arik’s twins were crawling around, Troy and Elliot’s triplets slept through most of it, and Ryker and Arin’s little warlock joined his cousins in slumber-ville. I spent as much time as I could with the cubs and little Edwin. He was so adorable, and if I couldn’t have my own, maybe I needed to ask Arik about some help.

  “Sweetheart? You okay? I’m getting that sad feeling again.”

  “I’m sorry, Gage. I’m fine. I’m just playing with Harrison and Bradley. The other four are sleeping.”

  “But why are you sad?”

  “Because…”

  “Linus, what have I told you?”

  “It’ll happen when it’s meant to. And that you love me no matter what.”

  “Come here. We can’t have you getting sad every time you’re around any of the cubs.”

  “I know. And I’m fine.”

  I gave Harrison and Bradley one last look before I left them in their playpen to chew on blocks and teething rings. I found my mate with the others. They were all sitting in the back room talking. I loved the back room of War’s house. It was basically a glass wall and had a beautiful view of the forest that surrounded the grounds.

  “There you are. We were wondering where you’d gone off to,” Arik said as I walked into the room.

  “I was playing with the twins.”

  “Oh, are they awake?”

  “Yes. I changed them and put them in their playpen. They’re chewing on blocks and teething rings.” Arik and War both got up from the couch, and Arik gave me a quick hug before following his mate to the nursery. I turned and went to mine and sat on his lap.

  “It’ll be okay, sweetheart. I promise.”

  “I know.” I snuggled into Gage’s chest and sighed. I was so thankful for him, and I needed to remember that he was amazing and more than enough to be happy.